by Fiona O'Meara
So many people ask me:
‘How can I use Focusing during the day?’
Whilst nothing can replace a longer Focusing session, turning towards ourselves during the day can lead to profound change — especially when done gently and skillfully.
P.A.L. is an acronym used by Ann Weiser Cornell that helps us attune to ourselves quickly and simply.
It stands for Pause, Acknowledge and Listen.
I find it useful for three reasons:
- Easy to remember.
- Easy to follow.
- Easy to notice when I’ve skipped a step (it contains the key elements of inner attending).
Here it is:
Pause:
Simply take a moment to pause and sense into your body. You might take a breath, feel your feet on the floor, and bring awareness to your body.
Acknowledge:
Notice what is going on inside. Feelings, thoughts, sensations, or a vague sense of something may come into awareness. Then gently turn towards what is there and simply say:
'Yes, I know you’re here.’
Ann often phrases this as:
‘I’m sensing something in me that feels this way, and I’m saying hello to that.’
You might also place a gentle hand on that area.
Listen:
Just listen to what is here, and how this place feels from its own perspective. There is no pressure for deep insight or immediate change. We are simply taking the time to listen.
This helps build inner trust and self-compassion. And if something does let you know how it feels, it can help to gently let it know:
‘I hear you.’
So give P.A.L a try and remember:
We are not doing this exercise in order to feel immediate relief.
We are simply giving attention to something that is asking for our attention.
We pause because something in us matters.
We acknowledge what is here with honesty.
And we listen with company rather than judgement.
Over time, this quiet way of relating to ourselves can help build greater calm, trust, compassion and resilience.
